Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Want Help Being a Better Husband?

Don't we all! I certainly do. I came across a blogsite the other day that I am truly excited about. And I definitely wanted to take the opportunity to recommend it to all husbands out there. The website is called iamhusband.com. Here is a link to it. The site is designed to address the reality that as husbands we fail sometimes. We lose our romance, our desire to be better, our motivation, and our sensitivity. And often times we don't even know why. We get wrapped up in our routines, we often forget what we are supposed to do, and we say things that hurt the feelings of the one we love more than anything in this world. We can be self-absorbed. And all of this leaves us with the feeling of being torn. We love our wives so much but often times we lack the abilty to express it. Sometimes we need help. And that is what this blog author has set out to do. He provides a forum for discussion after each of his articles. And he hits on the real life issues in marriage. It is great stuff. It appears that he has had this open for about a year now. I wish I had known about it sooner. I have no idea who it is that is actually doing this blog as he has left his name anonymous. All we know is that he is a husband who loves his wife very much and wants to help other husbands out there improve their marriages too. What a great idea! At the very least, go check it out for yourself and see what you think.

Something else that he addresses quite a bit is the issue of sex and how this is often a topic of struggle for married couples. He actually has a lot to say and recommend with regard to masterbation and pornography. Here is a great article from this blogsite with excellent insight written about pornography. If you want to watch a DVD that is very resourceful with people sharing their stories about pornography addiction, go to this website to order one. This DVD is also designed to help us as dads teach our children about these things and hopefully prevent it. As the website states, "in Christ and through Christ, there is freedom from the crushing grip of porn."

Also, a good book that is recommended for married men who struggle with pornography and masterbation can be found right here. It is called Sex, Men, and God by Douglas Weiss, Ph.D. I have not read it yet but intend to do so soon. I honestly cannot tell you how many people have come to my office (both those in my congregation as well as those outside) and have expressed their need for breaking their pornography addiction. To see a grown man in tears because he wants to be free from this demon but can't seem to get away from it is indeed heart wrenching. So I am going to add it to my loooooong list of books to read. It is a helpful tool for learning why some men have the sexual addictions they do. Dr. Weiss not only helps us understand the underlying problems with this addiction but also provides some practical guidelines for (1) breaking the vicious cycles involved and (2) helping others to do so. In addition, there is guidance in enjoying sexual freedom in your marriage.

In any event, I hope some of you find this information helpful in some way. Please pass it on. Unfortunately this is a problem that is ubiquitous. Some statistics have indicated that over 60% of MARRIED MEN struggle with these things. Many believe the numbers are actually higher.

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